Posts tagged ‘fear’

July 30, 2012

Acceptance…

I woke up, thinking about this poem I wrote a few years back called “Grief” (https://samanthamariahjane.wordpress.com/2010/03/10/grief/)…  I was trying to remember the ending…  I couldn’t remember the last step.  I woke up with the words going through my head, and for the life of me, couldn’t remember the last stage of grief.  I had to look and remember… Acceptance.  Yes. That’s it.

I wasn’t sure why this was in my head at first, but then

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November 1, 2011

Always Never

You said you stayed because you cared
about vows, and how to leave would be a sin.
Still, you were always never there

when all you craved lived in your prayers
for him, our lives, to be born again.
You said you stayed because you cared.

At least we never wondered where
we stood, steady on the brink of sink or swim
while you were always never there.

And, through your lens we learned to stare
into blackened worlds that kept you pinned,
but, you said, you stayed because you cared

enough to save us (not you) from despair
and to bury beauty beneath our skin.
No, you were always never there

for us, for me, except for when I dared
conceive just where you may have been
when you said you stayed because you cared.
Oh, poor mother, who was always never there.

~smj


Beacuse of You, Kelly Clarkson

September 11, 2011

Moment of Silence

The moment of silence,
of remembrance and reverence,
hung thick in the air,
out of place.
An invited intruder
that compels us
to stop

and listen –  for once.

The stillness moves us,
allows memories to flood
into hearts and eyes
so that we can almost see
with profound cognizance
what most often gets lost
in the crowded sounds
of life.

We listened – until,

the voice of a child,
caught up in his own moment,
broke the silence,
provoking a, “sssshhhhh” from his mother,
while others scowled,
convincing him to sit quietly
beside his deafening confusion.
Crying silently, he fit
right in.

The moment – lost.

~ smj

“No music, no pomp, just images and silence….

November 23, 2010

aim for fearless

aim for fearlessness
without losing hopefulness
damn consequences

~ smj

 The above is a little haiku that was inspired by a haiku written by my friend,  Robert Lew (the Haiku King ;).   I posted the above in response to his haiku titled  “less than”, and thought I’d share here as well:

less than

much less than you fear
but a lot less than you hope . . .
it’s just how things are

Posted by Robert Lew

(http://ahaikupoet.com)

They go well together, don’t they?
=)

April 19, 2010

Lady Luck (2nd Chances)

Second chances
 just happen sometimes
whimsical
magical
unpredictable
Lucky breaks

They take us by surprise
completely by chance
blunders of fate
as if Lady Luck herself
mistakenly showed up
knocking at the wrong door
but, seriously
think about it… ?
What are the odds of that?

Oh no, she was looking for you
Maybe she took her time
Maybe, you were just another item
on her long list of things to do
and, now
now, she’s here
staring you in the face
with her puppy dog eyes
that glisten with star dust
trying to convince you to believe
in tales of happily-ever-afters
and lucky ducks
who get second chances

You look past her eyes
into the cynical sea of reality
just behind her
where it is always waiting
willing you back
it sets off your guard 
 initiates the interrogation
slowly you question
everything
Is this really happening?
Where’s the catch?
Surely, there’s a catch
There’s always a catch
Right?

Lady Luck just smiles at you
so genuinely that your lips begin to follow suit
Her warmth is contagious
Her generosity –  immense
It’s overwhelming
in the best kind of way
You’re tempted to let it take over
To celebrate this miracle
Instead, you hesitate and wonder
Why?
How?
Do you deserve this?
This twist of fate? 
This wind of change? 
This lucky break? 
Do you?

Does it matter?
Does it?

Can’t you just look Lady Luck in the eye
her starry, puppy-dog eyes,
and say “thank you”?
no questions
no hesitation
just acceptance
thankfulness
and then
rejoice?

Or will you deny her?
insult her?
shoo her away?
So you can live to complain another day?
Because sometimes
it’s just easier
not to believe
in second chances
or luck
let alone attempt to actually feel
deserving

Lady Luck laughs to herself
and at the irony of people
who want to feel they deserve her gifts
Shaking her head with a smirk
and a gleam in her eyes
She whispers to no-one in particular
that only she decides
who is deserving
and when
or why
or even
if
And if not
how generous she will be
in spite of it all
because everyone knows
that she is admittedly
 as fickle
as they come

~  smj